Finding Community While Trekking Mt. Kilimanjaro

Brittany at Barafu Camp on Day 5 (15,331 ft of elevation)

I found myself saying yes to the wildest adventure of my life: climbing Mount Kilimanjaro with a group of strangers over seven relentless days. The registration was live so I quickly entered all my information and received an error message. I hurriedly entered the information again and at 4:04 pm, I received the email confirmation: I was going to hike Mt. Kilimanjaro on February 12, 2025!

I had a huge smile plastered to my face. I truly didn’t know what I had signed up for. I didn’t know anyone on the trip and had only virtually met one of the co-leaders. I had not been out of the country since 2018. All I knew was the promise I made to myself to do challenging things outside of my comfort zone this year. So, why not try climbing the highest mountain in Africa? 

As for the group dynamic, I do make friends pretty easily, but I wasn’t sure what to expect. Our culture has created the narrative that women-only groups means drama and betrayal. Would I be excluded from conversations since I was not as “outdoorsy” as others? I’ve only camped a handful of times and had not completed any hikes higher than 5,000 ft of elevation. I was equally nervous and excited to experience this trip. The lingering questions I had were, "will I belong?” and “will I make it to the top?”

I soon found out that it was everyone’s first time embarking on a trip of this magnitude. Every single person was there to learn from the mountain and to summit on the sixth day. A lot of us were also there to build self-confidence. We wanted to show ourselves that we could train for hard activities and accomplish them.

Looking up and down the table, I knew I had found an incredible group of women. Empathic. Trailblazers. Loud. Unapologetic. Goal chasers. Kind. Even more incredible than our group were our team’s porters and guides. We had a team of 60-80 porters and guides helping us. This included carrying our tents and sleeping bags, our extra duffel bag, cooking our meals, setting up each campsite, and ensuring no one was left behind on the trail.We finished dinner that night and prepared our bags for our early departure the next morning.

For the first five days of the trip, it was a steady uphill hike for 4-6 hours. We spent a lot of time talking about our families and values. From my position at the end of the line, I would frequently hear “Are you okay?”. “Do you need something?” Overhearing these simple statements that exude respect, companionship, and generosity made my heart swell. These are the ways women show up for each other that create the strong bonds that last a lifetime.

I was in awe of the things around me; the beauty of Tanzania, the friendliness of our porters and guides, and how well we all got along. We were all determined to pull each other up that mountain, no matter what. 

Kilimanjaro during the night. Picture by Tina Druskins (@tinadru)

On the sixth day, we started our hike at 11:30 pm to summit Mount Kilimanjaro. Because of the high elevation, low temperature, and high winds, our guides encouraged us to keep moving, no matter how slowly. ‘Pole pole’ was the mantra. It translates to “slowly, slowly”. Some of the group, including myself, fell behind.

We felt bone deep exhaustion and coldness and were begging the sun to rise. We could only see about five feet in front of us and it seemed that there was no end in sight. About three hours into the hike, I remember my inner thoughts got louder and louder. My mind was telling me it would be easier to turn around and drink hot coffee in the tent. I heard it tell me that this was silly. I couldn’t do this because I was too tired. I started to question why I had even signed up. 

I paused, looked up the mountain and saw the headlamps of my group. They all felt as awful as I did, but step by step, they kept going. Over the past five days, we had shared our anxieties and fears about this moment. Not one of us could say that we felt absolutely confident in our abilities to get to the top. However, I remembered the one promise we all made each other. “If you keep going, I will, too”. At that moment, a lot of us were continuing for ourselves, but we were also refusing to stop because we wanted the woman behind us to keep going and pursue her goal. I took a deep breath, quieted the thoughts, and focused on putting one foot in front of the other for the next five hours up the mountain. 

Our Kilimanjaro group before the hike that day.

Once I reached Stella Point, one of the three summit points on Mount Kilimanjaro, I took a quick break. At this point, I had witnessed the most breathtaking sunrise and had renewed hope that I would make it. From Stella Point, it was another hour until I reached Uhuru Peak, which was the highest free-standing peak on Kilimanjaro and would complete my journey. As I continued my trek to the peak, I received hugs, congratulations, and well wishes from my group who were making their way back down the mountain. In our mountain delirium, one of the co-leaders, Alyssa, grabbed my face and told me how proud of me she was for continuing, even when I fell behind. It was comforting to know that I was not forgotten and the others were still rooting for me. “Pole, pole”, I quietly repeated to myself. Slowly, slowly. One foot in front of the other. 

At 8:10 am, I summited Mount Kilimanjaro. I was overwhelmed with feelings of joy, sleepiness, and thankfulness of this moment that I had been dreaming about for the last year. In spite of those feelings, the tears wouldn’t come out because of how cold and dehydrated I was. My guide took pictures of me to celebrate the moment and three hours later, we were back at the campsite, resting until our next hike down the mountain in two hours. 

Me at Uhuru Peak.

When I look back on my experience, I’m not sure I would have completed the hike without these women, the Kili girls. I had the physical and mental strength, but I would have missed joy, laughter, and togetherness.  Community changes your inner thoughts from “can I?” to “we can”. It softens the physical pains, reminds you to not take life so seriously, and gives you the hug you need after tripping over another rock. During that week, I learned how to be more intentional in my conversations and listened intently. I missed my friends and family at home and I found it such a great gift to be surrounded by women who had walked similar paths to me. I began to hear the same insistent confirmations that I belong. I belong in this outdoor community. I belong in groups of fierce, fun, hard working women. I belong on mountain summits. I ultimately signed up for the trip to experience hiking Mt. Kilimanjaro, but left saying “came for the summit, but excelled due to the community”. This was the hardest adventure I had completed and despite the lows I encountered during it, I would choose to do it all over again.